Big Kid Job (sorta)

So, in case you haven't heard, I got an internship at the NAIA (National Association of Intercollegiate Athletics). For those of you who don't know (like somebody actually reads this... yeah, right), the NAIA performs basically all the same functions as the NCAA, but governs over smaller schools (Haskell, Benedictine, Mid-America Nazarence, etc.).

So I thought this was going to be right up my ally. My suspicion was quickly confirmed, when my first task was to read up on a self-reported recruiting violation and the ensuing investigation the school had done. Then we had a meeting about it (super fascinating!!), which was followed by a 20 minute debate about the Super Bowl and how my boss's dog is named Bettis (as in Jerome Bettis) and how the Steelers' defense has evolved.

Then, it was like I could hear the angels singing from the heavens, when the first place I was taken on my introduction tour was to the conference room where the Ladder Pong Tournament resides, and my name was already up on the list.

 Ladder Pong is a glorious invention (basically it's ping pong on a big conference table), but all the employees who participate are listed on the white board in order of superiority and you can only move up by challenging the person directly above you and beating them. The beauty of it is that Ladder Pong is available at all times, unless a meeting is going on in that conference room (which appears to be rare).

It's AWESOME!! Sick of doing your work? No problem! Go take a break and play ladder pong. Or read through your emails, only to discover that you've been copied on a thread trash-talking the president of the NAIA for getting his ass kicked in ladder pong.

Even better is that today we discussed having our own March Madness tournament, using the current standings to determine seeding for the tournament. So, as the new girl, while I'll be extremely low in the standings, anything can happen when you get to the tournament....... stay tuned. =)

Semester D-U-N DONE!

I wrote this a month ago after my last final, but forgot to post it until today... today being my first full day of being back to school, and thus I have just now run out of things to look at on the internet...


School is done for the semester!!! 5 semesters of law school down, 1 more to go. Molly always writes a summary of what she's learned in her classes, which I love because it's ridiculous to think of the amount of time and thousands of pages of material we've covered and we can sum up all we remember in a couple of words. So what I learned in Fall 2010:

Family Law - I blame Molly McCue Hartley 100% for making me suffer through a semester of this hell. Learning family law is like saying "teach yourself anatomy from a French anatomy book." You don't just have to learn anatomy, you have to learn the entire French language first. Likewise, family law is just figuring out how marriages/divorces/custody issues can interfere with and change when paired with all other aspects of the law - contracts, criminal law, torts, antitrust, business organizations, trusts and estates, banking law, etc.

Alternative Dispute Resolution - Trial may often be the wrong solution if you have a claim against someone. It may not meet your needs, and it'll suck up money like a black hole. Systems like mediation, arbitration and negotiation could actually address your specific interests and take up less of your time/money.

Amateur Sports Law - ummm.... awesome. Basically college sports and the NCAA and NAIA (hopefully - fingers crossed - my future employer) are so amazing and brilliant that they can handle their own biz-nass and the courts leave them alone... more or less.

Children in the Law - LOVED this class! Probably one of my most enjoyable and educational law school courses. Kids have very few rights, parents basically have the last word on how to raise and care for their children, and the state only steps in when it is necessary to protect the well-being of the child. A lot of kids in this country start out at a disadvantage from the beginning (poverty, class, race, residential location, etc.) and it can be a self-fulfilling cycle, but it's more than that. Education really does make all the difference in the world, and if there is only one thing you can control about your child, force them to go to school! With education they can change all the other factors in their lives, w/out it they're facing a much bigger hardship.

American Indian Law - the white man screwed over all the Indians. Under original colonial law, Indians weren't even considered "people" under the law, and thus couldn't own property outright. And we've acted like we've tried to make it all better, but really we've refused to do much of that, and only given back a very tiny percentage of land/animals/resources we stole from them. Also, Professor Ragsdale really, really, really wants to be a member of an Indian tribe.

National Security Law - some people really like guns. And nukes, and tanks, and all other big weapons. And don't like immigrants. And unfortunately, some of these people make it into the upper echelon of political and military leaders. Diplomacy is a good things, and all too rare.

I apologize if none of this made sense... I'm sitting in Starbucks, trying to decompress after my last final, and I literally feel like everything I've crammed into my head in the last two weeks has already fallen out.

let the feasting begin...

So I get home last night from a meeting, and what do I find....

Back up, reverse to the night before....

Nick and I are being lazy, watching TV, just ate an entire large pizza, and Nick says he has a sweet tooth. Now typically, I'm not really that big on sweets, but I go in phases and the last 4 or 5 months I have been craving anything with sugar non-stop.... like really, one day on a double at work, I went across the street to Price Chopper THREE TIMES to visit the cakes and pies section of the bakery.

(On a side note, been super obsessed with donuts lately too. Which is weird, because it all started the night I watched Monster about a week ago - w/Charlize Theron, great movie! - and we googled it to see what kind of prosethic makeup and such they used to make her look so unattractive. Turns out, she also gained 28 lbs, pretty much by living on Krispy Kreme. Disgusting, right? ... ummm.... apparently not, because ever since I have been jonesing for donuts... ate 4 yesterday... whoops)

Anyway, Nick wants cookies, and usually we have the premade cookie dough, precut into squares packages that you just pop on a cookie sheet and into the oven. Alas, we were out. So we decided to actually make them from scratch, and decided to spice it up a notch and make Choc-Oat-Chip Cookies. The recipe made a ton (4 cookie sheets full) and needless to say we had a bunch left over.

So after we had our fille, I put the rest in a big 10 x 8 airtight tupperware container, and left it sitting on the back of the counter in the kitchen.

.... fastforward to last night....

I get home from a meeting, greet the dogs and take them outside. It was cold, and they did their business quick, so I offered them a treat. Of course, their tails are wagging furiously and Reese has already started to drool at the sight of the treat. Then Wrigley gets up on her back legs and is pawing and licking at Reese's face, just to be sure he didn't leave any crumbs behind. You'd think they'd been starved.

Pat them on the head, good dogs, blah blah blah...

Walk into the kitchen to get a drink, and on the floor..... empty 10 x 8 tupperware. Not a crumb in sight. Apparently Reese must have stood up like a human and pawed them to the ground, where I'm sure my fat-ass puggle probably ate the majority of them. (She's a quarter of the size of Reese who weighs over 100lbs, but in the morning she'll bully him out of the way and eat all his food.)

Look back at dogs. Still wagging tails furiously.... though Wrigley does look a bit bloated.

So after reading Molly's post and hearing about Cesar's Way, pretty sure that's on top of my wish list for Christmas.

And a larger Santa outfit for Wrigley, because this is what I ordered, and pretty sure she'll no longer fit in a medium.

(Give me a break, the whole fam will be at my mom's for Christmas - we have to have a Santa.)

That time of the year again...

Finals suck.



End of post.

Observations from the Bsider

1. Away Chiefs games (especially big ones) = busy, crowded sports bars. Please do not tell me that comes as a surprise. More people / set # of bartenders/servers = less attention for you. My tips on avoiding possible frustrations:

Problem: waiting on drinks

Solution: order early, before you actually need one…. If you’re a fast drinker, maybe even order your next one when the server delivers the last one
Problem: waiting on food

Solution: order early, be prepared to wait a little while, or if you’re in a hurry order food that takes the least amount of prep time. Salads, chips/salsa, nachos (if they use queso, not melted cheese), soup or anything else that can be prepared ahead of time or without an oven/grill will be the fastest. Anything deep fried will always take longer. Across the board, pizzas and wings tend to take the longest.
Problem: can’t find a table/not enough chairs at your table/the TV nearest you is on a different game

Solution: If you care that much about the game, get there earlier! You can reserve enough tables, seats, etc. The only reason the TV by you is on the Denver game is because the Denver fan was smart enough to get there early and request that the TV be put on his game.

2. Please don’t be the jackass who thinks you can stand at a crowded bar, yell at the bartender, and automatically be helped first. Even worse, don’t think you can yell a generic girl’s name at the bartender and get helped. You think you’re being oh-so-clever by guessing my name, and that even if you’re wrong it’s going to seem cute or witty or flirtatious. If you yell “Hey Katie!” at me, I will probably turn around: (1) because I’m trying to figure out why there’s some random chick named Katie coming behind the bar, and (2) when I figure out what you’re doing, I want to see exactly who said it so I can be sure to serve you dead last.

3. The nicer you are to me, the nicer I am to you. If you acknowledge that I’m swamped and running my little butt off but doing a good job, I’m more likely to check on you first/more often every time around.
4. When guys ask for your number, be careful of just answering with a fake number. Apparently, creepster guys are getting smarter and getting wise to this. I watched this poor girl get completely humiliated when she gave this annoying guy a fake number and he said “Great. Here, I’ll call you so you have can save mine too.” …. Obviously, her phone (sitting 3 inches away on the bar) did not ring, and it was soooo embarrassing. For all of us (though I’m sure especially for him).

Don't Google.... Goodsearch!!!

Not really a blog post, but just something that I love and think is a great idea and wanted to share. I learned about the website Goodsearch.com four or five years ago from Reader's Digest. There was an article on ways to give back, and this was the one that stuck in my mind the most because it is soooo simple and is a part of your daily life anyway, and can really do some good.

Goodsearch is basically a search engine, powered by Yahoo! and shows all the same results as a Yahoo! search would, so it's really thorough. The difference is that every time you search, you're making money for charity. All the advertising money on the website (like the sponsored results and the banner ads along the tops) goes straight to charity, instead of to Yahoo! or Google. Like I said, it was a few years ago so I don't remember all the details, but I think that money is donated for every search you make, every search result you click on, etc.

The part I like the best is that you can choose what charity to Goodsearch for, and there are TONS! When I lived in Lawrence I volunteered at the Lawrence Humane Society and saw firsthand how bad they could use some donations, so it was awesome that I was able to help contribute without having to give away some of my extremely meager student loans that I was living on. There's always a Charity of the Day that's highlighted, and if I remember correctly that charity gets all the proceeds of any searches made that day when a charity isn't specificed by the user. And not that it matters, but it also shows "Who's Goodsearching" and tells you some celebrities that Goodsearch and for what charity, as well as businesses that work with/donate to Goodsearch.... make me feel a little bit better about spending my money if I'm shopping with them.

BBR, Part 2

This is a continuation from my last post….

Not really a deep thought, but I may have possibly witnessed the biggest case of Little Man Syndrome / Douchebaggery ever. Subject: male, probably 5’6” – 5’8,” shaved head, attractive face (to be honest, he was pretty hot for a little guy), dressed in trendy flannel shirt, fitted guy jeans, boat shoes, and leather necklace w/a metal pendant (think Hollister).

He shows up in the BBR all by himself, no friends in sight. To begin, he’s all over the dance floor, trying to show off his moves, smiling and winking at anyone who looks his way. Then he’s flirting w/some girl in a skanky purple tank top. Buys her a buttery nipple shot (hint: guys, if for whatever reason you ever care what a bartender thinks about you, don’t get a buttery/slippery nipple shot. You look a pansy with bad taste. We will make fun of you.). Also knocks over girl’s beer in the process, has to buy her a new one.She goes to the bathroom, he repeats ridiculous behavior on the dance floor.

Finds two girls and molests them. He starts on Blonde Friend and proceeds to dry hump her from behind, leaving Brunette Friend to dance by herself, looking and surely feeling very awkward as she watches her friend get violated. But don’t worry, soon he has roped her into the action, latching one arm around Brunette Friend so that she must dance on his ass while he continues to grind on Blonde Friend, effectively making a Douchebag Sandwich. Cute girls, very nice, I had talked to them earlier… was very disappointed in them for letting this happen. Buys them all shots and a beer for himself, proceeds to knock over his earlier beer (which was still ¾ full), looks at it, looks at me, winks, and walks away.

Somehow this threesome breaks up, and at next sighting he has reunited with Purple tank top girl. He resumes dancing with her, from behind of course so he can still eye f*ck every other girl in sight. Back to the bar, buys them both bottled beers. Lifts his to his lips, misses his mouth by a good three inches, pours beer all over his exposed chest and down his flannel shirt. Embarrassed? Nope. Grabs girl behind the head and rams it towards him, so that she can lick spilled beer off his chest. I try not to puke in my mouth. He looks at me… winks.

I get busy, lose visual contact. When I get a break, I find him again on the dance floor wrangling in new girl. Big girl (refer to last post). I realize he has a signature move: I call it Quicksand. He corrals any girl not currently dancing with another guy when she comes within his wingspan. He reaches out an arm, wraps it around the waist, and curls her in like an octopus (or what I think octopuses (octopi?) do). He is the center, his reach is the radius… get within that circumference and you’re a goner. Just like quicksand.

Anyway, he has roped in Big Girl and she seems to be enjoying getting it from behind, so much so that she gives some back. Big butt bumping into him proves too much for little guy, and he literally goes bouncing off. Bounced in the direction of the bar, naturally he comes for a drink. At this point, Chad (other bartender) have literally been laughing at and providing our own commentary on this guy for nearly two hours. I lose Rock, Paper, Scissors, and have to go see what he wants. Orders bottled beer. I can not make this up – as soon as I place the fresh beer on the bar, he once again knocks over his earlier beer.

Why keep serving him, you might ask? 1: He tips (Chad and I have already decided that based on his clothing, his attitude, and the fact that he has money, he’s probably from Shawnee Mission East). 2: He cannot be that drunk, seeing as how the beer in his hand is always at least ½ full and he continuously spills that. 3: It is a horrendously slow night (Plaza Art Fair night), we can’t really afford to turn away business when his only sign of drunkenness is foolishness, and as described above, I am quite certain that is his overriding character trait.

He orders a beer and a shot of Rumplemintz. For those of you who may not know, Rumple is 100 proof peppermint schnapps, so it's super strong. It's also delicious and tastes just like Christmas. (And in one of those cases where dumb/drunk people say something so stupid it kinda makes sense, I was once told: "It's the perfect thing to take at last call because it's so minty fresh. If you're going home with somebody, you don't have to brush your teeth. And if you get pulled over, the cops won't smell the alcohol and won't think you've been drinking." But I digress...)  The important point here is that it's also clear. So I grab a shot glass, turn my back to him and fill it with water. It's close to last call, and I've decided I am done dealing with this guy (Thursday night a guy threw up on the bar in front of me... not in the mood for a repeat). As described in the rest of this post, this guy is clearly a winner. He takes the shot, slams the shotglass down on the bar, and shakes his head like he's motorboating someone, like he just took straight well tequila. And winks, like now I'll really think he's a badass for taking the whole shot. Clearly he's convinced that I am under this impression, because instead of walking away, he leans on the bar and leans toward me. Trying not to laugh right at him, I raise my eyebrows as if to say "Yes???" He proceeds to tell me how beautiful I am and how beautiful my eyes are. Now, if I didn't already know he was drunk, this would be a clear giveaway, as I have horrible allergies this time of year and my eyes are completely bloodshot and I look like a total crackhead. Again, I try not to laugh in his face (though I do laugh, but hopefully he doesn't realize it's 100% at him and not at all with him), and mumble thank you or something along those lines. Bad move. Now he asks what my plans are after work. I tell him going home with my boyfriend and point to Chad, who is standing behind me eavesdropping, laughing so hard his face is about to turn purple. (Chad is fantastic, but all you have to do is look at us to see that we have COMPLETELY different styles, and that Chad is about 10 years older than me.) I fear this didn't work, because he grabs my hand from across the bar. He kissed my hand... winks... and walks away.

Somehow Purple Tank Top Girl is still around and has not been swept up, and they reunite on the dance floor. A little more skanky dry humping before last call and the lights finally come on. Much to my breathless delight, I get one final wink as he and girl head up the stairs. While I would have preferred to be too busy to witness any of this, if I couldn't make any money, at least I had some good laughs.